I Hear the Secrets That You Keep/When You're Talking in Your Sleep

This fall, Republicans have seemed like they were talking in their sleep. And why not? What do they have to talk about? They have been in total control of government for about six years now, and what do they have to show for it?

1. Tax cuts for the absurdly wealthy, which are now hurting us badly.
2. Faith-based social services, which turn out to have been a political ploy this whole time.
3. "Missile defense" that preoccupied Bush when "Bin Laden Determined to Attack Inside US" couldn't get his attention.
4. A made-to-order, Think Tank brand quagmire in the Middle East.
5. Flushing the environment down the toilet.
6. A screw-everyone-not-named-Pfizer (or Wyeth, or Merck, etc.) drug plan.
7. An attempt to take money away from little old ladies.
8. Disingenuous and ineffective education policy.
9. An eviscerated Constitution.
10. I could go on.

So Republicans have basically shown that they're out to ruin the country, which means there's no agenda left for them to talk about. Instead, they've gone on auto-pilot. They're doing what they do best: scare tactics. Negative advertising has been a big one this cycle for both teams, but especially on the Republican side. They've had some good ones in Tennessee, and some others nationally.

Better yet is the flap this week over John Kerry's statement on education and Iraq. This is what Kerry said on Monday:

“You know, education, if you make the most of it, if you study hard and do your homework, and you make an effort to be smart, uh, you can do well. If you don’t, you get stuck in Iraq.”

To me, this is more of a joke on how the Bush administration has heightened income inequality and provided a way to get yourself killed if you're poor. It probably wouldn't be my first example if you asked me to cite some jokes that were in good taste, but whatever. Republicans, on the other hand, are the party that brought you the politics of stains and Christmas cards. They absolutely couldn't wait to pounce on their whipping boy Kerry, who they mercilessly antogonized for his alleged lack of patriotism in 2004. Except this time, a full two years too late, Kerry actually fought back with some really good points. Such as the fact that he's actually a decorated veteran, while none of the people attacking him have any significant service. Kerry doesn't need to apologize for this, and it would actually be better if he didn't.

So Republicans, faced with nothing else to run on, are running on a platform of attacking the people who are trying to fix their humongous mess. Fortunately for them, this is what comes naturally. They can talk like this in their sleep. But when they do, it's no secret what they're not talking about.